I was even denied the protection order. I owned the home, it was taken under duress.
I have literally nothing else, my ebt didn’t even show up this month but I just represented myself and have full custody after 6 years of fighting, if anyone wants to connect.
Mothers have an excellent class action against family court. A safe parent should have the right to protect their children. They don’t. I was held in contempt and fined his legal fees first, which was not reversed.
CPS cannot be held liable for not doing their job either. The courts are trafficking children to affluent abusers this way.
1. I never gave up. I told my kids I wouldn't, that it may take a long time, but I was ALWAYS fighting.
2. I learned from the mistakes in the original dissolution, they forced me into mediation (and then did not file for 5 months to run down my civil remedies statute of limitations).
3. I noticed when they began running the same games on me. When I began "breaking rules" (like not forcing the children back home) they couldn't control or predict me, but stayed the path (accusing me of things they couldn't prove because they didn't happen).
4. I kept going myself, when I could no longer afford (as if I ever could) an attorney. Law Help and similar resources are your friend. I used AI to research case law.
5. I was not afraid of his lawyer. She showed up to bully me in IEP meetings, but was also on record defaming me to law enforcement and CPS. She told LE I was a "force to be reckoned with" while they were on body cam. Not only did I use AI to create a transcript (or any law enforcement encounter, there were calls to his home , I referenced this IN the IEP meeting so she knew I knew exactly what she said. She was my enemy, but not, she screwed him on legal fees ($76 every time he uploaded) and clearly stoked his fears which made him act irrationally.
6. I did not mudsling, not once, no matter how tempting (they cannot help themselves). Being autistic probably helped me here. The net effect: I was the adult in the room.
7. I proved neglect, do to the MANY pictures of matted hair, bruises, bite marks, and the home (when I had access)
8. Our children disclosed abuse, and finally refused to return. I kept CPS (used to harass us) informed and shared documentation. I was held in contempt, but did not give up. In the end it just demonstrated abusive litigation (like a series of filings he made in the original disso with an undisclosed trust fund), especially given my repeated efforts for a protection order and that I had filed for the parenting plan revision months earlier. It took wind out of "she's just filing now because she broke the rules."
9. Evidence: UN Report on PAS, Appendix H of the Judges Manual for Washington State (describes coercive abuse). Research the industry of pedos pushing the PAS narrative, including the person who coined the phrase who felt children seduced their parents and it was good for evolution.
10. I did not dignify most of the bs he said with a response. One of his filings was 400 pages. Don't take the bait.
11. I kept everything about the kids, not me. I might get an honorable mention like (re insufficient support, nothing for 3 years, 1k for 3 years when I was forced into 1 year at mediation). How coparenting was never appropriate for our situation (autistic kiddos).
12. Look closely at the financials. Mine was cash apping women, taking out cash at casinos, at bars every night, cash apping women, and apparently had a breathalyzer device installed in his car. It looked like a rich kid's expenses, while he was claiming he couldn't afford standard child support.
I was home taking care of our traumatized children and cashed out the pension and retirement I got in the disso to do it. After he took the home I owned.
13. Have people who have known you a long time write emails or statements. He showed up with one from a dude who was a lawyer who knew him from karaoke bars (after the children's refusal, doesn't know me or the children).
14. Don't be bullied. Mine pulled my 35+ year estranged abusive parent (just like him) into all of this. She wrote bullshit like his, that he submitted it. That's abusive use of conflict too, and he was too dumb to recognize it.
She showed up HERE on substack on Black Friday (the day before our pretrial) to try to shake me, and embarass/discredit me. My response (not to her, after I blocked her):
Imagine growing up with strange men calling your mother jizz wiz and she shows up here 35 years later to say I hope she doesn't kiss her kids with that mouth.
And imagine looking someone up on Substack after 35 years to accuse them of stalking you.
I haven't heard from her since, nor him since losing custody.
15. Don't stay silent. I began writing about it openly here in notes and other pieces. If it's factual they can't do a damn thing. I learned pretty damn fast my situation was not remotely unique, just overwhelming.
16. Choose informal trial with oral arguments. Be respectful and solemn while they rant and rave about how crazy you are. I took notes. I did not emote or interrupt when he said something hurtful. He looked like he'd been shot during my testimony and then cried saying I was trying to take the Seahawks tickets his daddy gave him BECAUSE I ASKED THE INCOME FROM RESELLING THEM BE CONSIDERED.
17. The rest he really did himself. He's a narcissist. He could not accept accountability for anything and did not take orders or corrections from the Judge well. Always give them enough rope, but no parent is required to physically force their children to a parent when they refuse.
18. If you need it (this is a lot!), get therapy, get the kiddos therapy. Be honest about the situation. Most caregivers know exactly what this is and they are mandatory reporters.
19. Be CONCISE and FACTUAL. Organize your evidence logically. Meditate (or something that centers/relaxes you) before court appearances.
20. STAY POSITIVE. My partner said my ex would at least get alternate weekends or something. I never wavered and my kiddos are finally safe.
Also:
In my contempt case, I also pointed out Rideout (the golden rule for child refusal) does not address abuse or special needs. Your state may use different but keep hammering on that, it will help everyone after you. Cite cases before you where they have SUCCEEDED and state laws.
We submitted our entire talking parents history, consider communicating ONLY through such an app (that one is free) and getting it ORDERED any time you are in front of a judge.
I also see places my attorneys gave terrible advice and focused too much on "law" without the ABUSE. Don't let yours bury the headline.
Now:
Since that order, he didn't submit to the mental health evaluation he said "he was happy to get as long as I got one" by the deadline, and our judge retained the case for a year. I got mine within 2 weeks while he filed a motion for reconsideration that would piss any judge off and received simply a DENIED ruling. He still doesn't have his and it's over a month past the deadline.
I hate these oppressors with a total hatred! Continuing with you in the fight to bring all children home and get these wretched court co-conspirators locked up. We Will Make No Peace With Oppression by The Porters's Gate!
Status Quo Agenda as always. Destroy mothers and place children in torture chambers. Only the male gender has rights and is entitled to punish, dehumanize and destroy. Childrens' forming identities are systematically dismantled and they are left empty obedient shells. Flame extinguished.
The male gender is a failing gender. The patriarchy is punishing women for daring to leave abusive dangerous males. They are careless with women’s lives and believe the male voice over the woman. Has always been that way.
The male gender is dangerously furious towards women. We are being hunted.
Or are challenged, feel less than and inferior. We are witnessing the further destruction of women on every front. How dare we stand up to the patriarchy. We will all pay.
There is a DISTINCT PATTERN here. I have talked to a LOT of women going through a divorce and what I have observed is that those women who don't have children seem to be doing relatively okay in family courts. It's when a woman has children i.e. is a MOTHER, that the FAMILY COURT ABUSE begins. Family Courts are undoubtedly targeting Mothers and Protective Mothers in particular.
Once you live some variation of this you suddenly learn of the unbelievably huge number of others also experiencing this. It seems anyone that hasn’t experienced it, is in complete willful denial. My friend Karina calls it the “injustice” system and she is exactly right.
Case dynamics are so disgustingly similar! Repetitive--o
Change the System? The system now, stretches throughout & is Globally Mirrored!
The US Judiciary KNOWS. The House Knows. The Senate Knows. They've KNOWN for Decades.
Where would the Monopoly be if it wasn't for the exploitation of Families?
The undertaking for a New "System" is as EPIC & Historic as the 1st Continental Congress of America & the Rebellion from Great Britain!
But WAIT, where did the US Legal System come from... Ohhh, that's right, Great Britain!!! Seems to be quite literally the decision & the changes need to come from the Vatican?
What's the BAR? It's the BRITISH ACCREDITATION REGISTRY!
An attorney "attorns"= To turn over another!
To transfer one's obligations from a person to another person.
To consent to the transfer of one's obligations as tenant under a lease to a new landlord.
To acknowledge the jurisdiction of (a particular court) over one's dispute.
Why aren't WE educating ourselves as to the Courts being BANKS? That each court is a solo business entity? That us common folks; the non-association peeps, are in fact EQUITY?!
Why don't we look at the signers from the declaration of independence? Do take notice of all the "Esquires"!
The "legal system". 🤔------ Family & Family Court don't belong in the same sentence together!!
This isn't a medieval Society where judicial duels were fought by Knights & Squires to end various disputes! Giving families e.g. a man & a woman & children, swords in a coliseum (courtroom) and say here you go-- Fight! To the Death!! This is how it's becoming!!
------ WHY do we keep trying to do the wrong things Better?
Court should in no way be synonymous with Family. There's too much to lose, too much to damage, too much to destroy!
How can I compel my community's powers in authority to prosecute a domestic terrorist if I'm invisible?
The next story here could very well be mine and that terrifies me!
It's not Global as in ALL the countries across the world - I initially thought so too then I looked at laws across different countries and this problem exists mostly in the English speaking world (North America, Europe, Australia etc) where women, and children don't have any specific rights or protection - just a lot of talk but nothing in the written Law itself. I know this is shocking for those of us who have been raised ('programmed') to believe all our lives that we are the advanced, emancipated nations but the ground reality unfortunately does not confirm that delusion. The written Laws in the English speaking world are very male-centric / patriarchal.
Judge Michael Perez refused to order a father to follow the court order to return child to her care even though the father's house was in a dangerous situation with no power or phone service due to an emergency situation.
This is almost identical to my situation…..oh God bless her poor soul
Me too. Want to connect? Twitter @higherheather
Similar.
I was even denied the protection order. I owned the home, it was taken under duress.
I have literally nothing else, my ebt didn’t even show up this month but I just represented myself and have full custody after 6 years of fighting, if anyone wants to connect.
Mothers have an excellent class action against family court. A safe parent should have the right to protect their children. They don’t. I was held in contempt and fined his legal fees first, which was not reversed.
CPS cannot be held liable for not doing their job either. The courts are trafficking children to affluent abusers this way.
Excellent!! How did you manage that? Do tell ...
1. I never gave up. I told my kids I wouldn't, that it may take a long time, but I was ALWAYS fighting.
2. I learned from the mistakes in the original dissolution, they forced me into mediation (and then did not file for 5 months to run down my civil remedies statute of limitations).
3. I noticed when they began running the same games on me. When I began "breaking rules" (like not forcing the children back home) they couldn't control or predict me, but stayed the path (accusing me of things they couldn't prove because they didn't happen).
4. I kept going myself, when I could no longer afford (as if I ever could) an attorney. Law Help and similar resources are your friend. I used AI to research case law.
5. I was not afraid of his lawyer. She showed up to bully me in IEP meetings, but was also on record defaming me to law enforcement and CPS. She told LE I was a "force to be reckoned with" while they were on body cam. Not only did I use AI to create a transcript (or any law enforcement encounter, there were calls to his home , I referenced this IN the IEP meeting so she knew I knew exactly what she said. She was my enemy, but not, she screwed him on legal fees ($76 every time he uploaded) and clearly stoked his fears which made him act irrationally.
6. I did not mudsling, not once, no matter how tempting (they cannot help themselves). Being autistic probably helped me here. The net effect: I was the adult in the room.
7. I proved neglect, do to the MANY pictures of matted hair, bruises, bite marks, and the home (when I had access)
8. Our children disclosed abuse, and finally refused to return. I kept CPS (used to harass us) informed and shared documentation. I was held in contempt, but did not give up. In the end it just demonstrated abusive litigation (like a series of filings he made in the original disso with an undisclosed trust fund), especially given my repeated efforts for a protection order and that I had filed for the parenting plan revision months earlier. It took wind out of "she's just filing now because she broke the rules."
9. Evidence: UN Report on PAS, Appendix H of the Judges Manual for Washington State (describes coercive abuse). Research the industry of pedos pushing the PAS narrative, including the person who coined the phrase who felt children seduced their parents and it was good for evolution.
10. I did not dignify most of the bs he said with a response. One of his filings was 400 pages. Don't take the bait.
11. I kept everything about the kids, not me. I might get an honorable mention like (re insufficient support, nothing for 3 years, 1k for 3 years when I was forced into 1 year at mediation). How coparenting was never appropriate for our situation (autistic kiddos).
12. Look closely at the financials. Mine was cash apping women, taking out cash at casinos, at bars every night, cash apping women, and apparently had a breathalyzer device installed in his car. It looked like a rich kid's expenses, while he was claiming he couldn't afford standard child support.
I was home taking care of our traumatized children and cashed out the pension and retirement I got in the disso to do it. After he took the home I owned.
13. Have people who have known you a long time write emails or statements. He showed up with one from a dude who was a lawyer who knew him from karaoke bars (after the children's refusal, doesn't know me or the children).
14. Don't be bullied. Mine pulled my 35+ year estranged abusive parent (just like him) into all of this. She wrote bullshit like his, that he submitted it. That's abusive use of conflict too, and he was too dumb to recognize it.
She showed up HERE on substack on Black Friday (the day before our pretrial) to try to shake me, and embarass/discredit me. My response (not to her, after I blocked her):
Imagine growing up with strange men calling your mother jizz wiz and she shows up here 35 years later to say I hope she doesn't kiss her kids with that mouth.
And imagine looking someone up on Substack after 35 years to accuse them of stalking you.
I haven't heard from her since, nor him since losing custody.
15. Don't stay silent. I began writing about it openly here in notes and other pieces. If it's factual they can't do a damn thing. I learned pretty damn fast my situation was not remotely unique, just overwhelming.
16. Choose informal trial with oral arguments. Be respectful and solemn while they rant and rave about how crazy you are. I took notes. I did not emote or interrupt when he said something hurtful. He looked like he'd been shot during my testimony and then cried saying I was trying to take the Seahawks tickets his daddy gave him BECAUSE I ASKED THE INCOME FROM RESELLING THEM BE CONSIDERED.
17. The rest he really did himself. He's a narcissist. He could not accept accountability for anything and did not take orders or corrections from the Judge well. Always give them enough rope, but no parent is required to physically force their children to a parent when they refuse.
18. If you need it (this is a lot!), get therapy, get the kiddos therapy. Be honest about the situation. Most caregivers know exactly what this is and they are mandatory reporters.
19. Be CONCISE and FACTUAL. Organize your evidence logically. Meditate (or something that centers/relaxes you) before court appearances.
20. STAY POSITIVE. My partner said my ex would at least get alternate weekends or something. I never wavered and my kiddos are finally safe.
Also:
In my contempt case, I also pointed out Rideout (the golden rule for child refusal) does not address abuse or special needs. Your state may use different but keep hammering on that, it will help everyone after you. Cite cases before you where they have SUCCEEDED and state laws.
We submitted our entire talking parents history, consider communicating ONLY through such an app (that one is free) and getting it ORDERED any time you are in front of a judge.
I also see places my attorneys gave terrible advice and focused too much on "law" without the ABUSE. Don't let yours bury the headline.
Now:
Since that order, he didn't submit to the mental health evaluation he said "he was happy to get as long as I got one" by the deadline, and our judge retained the case for a year. I got mine within 2 weeks while he filed a motion for reconsideration that would piss any judge off and received simply a DENIED ruling. He still doesn't have his and it's over a month past the deadline.
All my love to anyone going through this. <3
I hate these oppressors with a total hatred! Continuing with you in the fight to bring all children home and get these wretched court co-conspirators locked up. We Will Make No Peace With Oppression by The Porters's Gate!
Status Quo Agenda as always. Destroy mothers and place children in torture chambers. Only the male gender has rights and is entitled to punish, dehumanize and destroy. Childrens' forming identities are systematically dismantled and they are left empty obedient shells. Flame extinguished.
This is my daughters trauma to a TEE! We lost her Tuesday morning. She never recovered from the pain
So very sorry for your loss. That's so awful. So many women suffering...
If you would like to send her story, email womenscoalitionintl@gmail.com
Can I still send in her story he took me almost 2 years to grieve
I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m in this situation right now and no one will help me.
Oh noooo, so sad, so very sorry 🙏
O, O N E MORE TIME ... ... YET A G A I N = NO MUCKING WORDS.
UTTERLY ANGERING = the patriarchs and their unctuous sycophants
( of ALL genders ) within the " family " " law " courts ... ... W O R L D W I D E.
December 4, 2022
Here is the link to my article in the May 6, 2015, issue of the Davis Vanguard entitled “The Criminal Cottage Industry Operating in Family Cours.”
https://www.davisvanguard.org/2015/05/the-criminal-cottage-industry-operating-in-family-courts/
Tilahun Yilma, DVM, PhD
Distinguished Professor of Virology, Emeritus
Member, US National Academy of Sciences
Fellow, American Academy of Microbiology
Department of Medical Micro/Immunology
School of Medicine
University of California Davis, CA 95616
I’m going to read this. I am a victim and I’ll be the next one dead.
That judge should be held criminally responsible for her death.
The male gender is a failing gender. The patriarchy is punishing women for daring to leave abusive dangerous males. They are careless with women’s lives and believe the male voice over the woman. Has always been that way.
The male gender is dangerously furious towards women. We are being hunted.
When men face rejection they destroy.
Women cry.
Or are challenged, feel less than and inferior. We are witnessing the further destruction of women on every front. How dare we stand up to the patriarchy. We will all pay.
There is a DISTINCT PATTERN here. I have talked to a LOT of women going through a divorce and what I have observed is that those women who don't have children seem to be doing relatively okay in family courts. It's when a woman has children i.e. is a MOTHER, that the FAMILY COURT ABUSE begins. Family Courts are undoubtedly targeting Mothers and Protective Mothers in particular.
Once you live some variation of this you suddenly learn of the unbelievably huge number of others also experiencing this. It seems anyone that hasn’t experienced it, is in complete willful denial. My friend Karina calls it the “injustice” system and she is exactly right.
This is heartbreaking 💔 That judge needs to be behind bars.
Lost my daughter nov 2022 due to legal and family court abuse. She couldn’t handle it
✨✔✨OMG! Noo!💔
Case dynamics are so disgustingly similar! Repetitive--o
Change the System? The system now, stretches throughout & is Globally Mirrored!
The US Judiciary KNOWS. The House Knows. The Senate Knows. They've KNOWN for Decades.
Where would the Monopoly be if it wasn't for the exploitation of Families?
The undertaking for a New "System" is as EPIC & Historic as the 1st Continental Congress of America & the Rebellion from Great Britain!
But WAIT, where did the US Legal System come from... Ohhh, that's right, Great Britain!!! Seems to be quite literally the decision & the changes need to come from the Vatican?
What's the BAR? It's the BRITISH ACCREDITATION REGISTRY!
An attorney "attorns"= To turn over another!
To transfer one's obligations from a person to another person.
To consent to the transfer of one's obligations as tenant under a lease to a new landlord.
To acknowledge the jurisdiction of (a particular court) over one's dispute.
Why aren't WE educating ourselves as to the Courts being BANKS? That each court is a solo business entity? That us common folks; the non-association peeps, are in fact EQUITY?!
Why don't we look at the signers from the declaration of independence? Do take notice of all the "Esquires"!
The "legal system". 🤔------ Family & Family Court don't belong in the same sentence together!!
This isn't a medieval Society where judicial duels were fought by Knights & Squires to end various disputes! Giving families e.g. a man & a woman & children, swords in a coliseum (courtroom) and say here you go-- Fight! To the Death!! This is how it's becoming!!
------ WHY do we keep trying to do the wrong things Better?
Court should in no way be synonymous with Family. There's too much to lose, too much to damage, too much to destroy!
How can I compel my community's powers in authority to prosecute a domestic terrorist if I'm invisible?
The next story here could very well be mine and that terrifies me!
It's not Global as in ALL the countries across the world - I initially thought so too then I looked at laws across different countries and this problem exists mostly in the English speaking world (North America, Europe, Australia etc) where women, and children don't have any specific rights or protection - just a lot of talk but nothing in the written Law itself. I know this is shocking for those of us who have been raised ('programmed') to believe all our lives that we are the advanced, emancipated nations but the ground reality unfortunately does not confirm that delusion. The written Laws in the English speaking world are very male-centric / patriarchal.
So true. We are WORTHLESS...
The judge in my divorce, was a complete misogynistic asshole.
He even made all kinds of errors on the final paperwork, giving more money to my ex.
I had to go back to court to get it fixed, at my expense.
Oh Judge Lee Gabriel... he's a bad egg.
Judge Michael Perez refused to order a father to follow the court order to return child to her care even though the father's house was in a dangerous situation with no power or phone service due to an emergency situation.
Was this a suicide? Thank you for sharing.